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If you are married, or not but living together, there are compromises that need to be made on both sides. I could talk about general cleaning, sex and money, but I would rather not. You have to work that part out for yourselves. But what I do want to talk about is what happens in the kitchen!

From the get go in our relationship, and we moved in together before we got married, I told my husband that there were rules to our kitchen, and if he was not on board with these rules, then I should plan on finding someone else and someplace else to live. We loved each other and I knew that we would be coming to some compromises here.

The first and foremost kitchen rule is this: If I cook, you clean. No arguing. This is the rule. I will not cook an entire meal, clean as I go, and have to clean afterwards. OK – so this had to be modified after the first dinner I cooked for us. I cooked and did not clean as I went. He griped. I helped clean that night and since then, I clean as I go. This has worked out well. And, this rule goes both ways: I cook, he cleans, and he cooks, I clean. And, we clean as we go, or as my friend Conor in Ireland says you CAYG! Thank you Conor!

Next, I work and my husband is retired. As I work, and he is now retired, I cook 4 nights a week, and he is relegated to three nights. How does this work? Planning! My husband cooks on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday nights, which is why you rarely see food posts on those nights, and the rest of the time is mine. This takes some working out, depending on schedules, but for us this works really well. I finish my week, thanks to furlough Friday’s, on Thursday nights, and I start planning on Monday what I need for recipes I plan on cooking. BTW – before I started this blog, we did this then too.

Figure out the dinner menu. We both have busy days. Just like with Mom and Dad, at their house, whatever is put on the table for you for dinner, you eat. We both take into account what each of us likes and don’t like. He doesn’t serve me Lima beans and I don’t serve him brussel sprouts!

Margarine is not allowed in our house. Margarine is really bad for you, and butter is really good, as long as you do not over do it. If you want your recipes to taste really good, butter makes the dish. Margarine does not. There is too much water and oil in margarine. No compromise here: We both prefer butter to margarine.

Every now and then we do have frozen dinners. Not Banquet, nor Swanson’s. Sometimes you just do not feel like cooking, or putting a huge meal together. Whatever we choose, we make sure that the food is healthy.

No, and I mean absolutely NO, macaroni and cheese from a box. When I moved in with my husband, he had about a dozen boxes in the cupboard. Then I made him my macaroni and cheese. Since eating my macaroni and cheese that uses real cheese, he refuses to even look at a box of mac ‘n cheese. We donated the boxes to a food drive.

Everyone eats leftovers. No food goes to waste! Enough said.

Whatever you decide, whether living together or married, compromise is a big part of this life, and the kitchen is a good place to start!

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